What Happened with the 14 year-old that got me 5 Years of Prison
(TLDR: What got me arrested for 5 years in American Prison was I had a 14-year-old girlfriend when I was 20 years old. We were exchanging nude pictures, she constantly flirted with me and begged me for nude pictures. I’ve never met her in person. Eventually, I was arrested and charged for ‘Child grooming’ and ‘Possession of Child Pornography’)
So when I was in the United States living in the State of Illinois, I met a 14-year-old girl online. Her name is Brie. Brie was living in Texas. I was 20-years-old at that time. We chatted either by text or voice or video call, built a relationship, and eventually after a month I asked if she wanted to be my girlfriend and she said ‘yes’. I always knew Brie was 14 and that if we had a sexual relationship, it’d be illegal. But I always defended sexual acts between adults and children if they’re consensual and harmless, and I’ve always had a willingness to break unjust laws. So I proceeded with the relationship.
Several times, every day, we would take naked pictures of ourselves and share them with each other. She absolutely loved it. She was always sending me sexual pictures without me asking. Many times she’d beg me to continue sending sexual pictures and messages to her.
Now I definitely wasn’t a good boyfriend. I was actually verbally abusive. I’d get incredibly jealous and snap at her when she complimented one of her guy friends for being handsome. When she wanted to dye her hair red or wanted to wear a care bear swimsuit to the swimming pool, I said it made her look like a ‘whore’. When she said she liked Megan Fox and her favorite movie was ‘Jennifer’s Body’, I’d say she was so stupid and shallow (Jennifer’s Body actually turned out to be a great movie).So I’d say insecure and verbally abusive things plenty of times throughout our 3-month relationship. Until finally, very wisely, she broke up with me.
After that, I made the very typical classic ex-boyfriend mistake of instead of just respecting her decision and leaving her alone, I kept on texting her, begging her to come back to me. When she blocked my number, I found another number. I emailed her, she blocked my email. I got my friends to try to persuade her, she blocked them too. Until after a month I gave up, and that’s that.
About 1 year after my relationship with her ended, I got arrested by the American police. They got me for 17 counts of either child pornography or child grooming charges. And all of those charges came from just the nude pictures we exchanged with each other. To this day, I still have no idea exactly what lead to Brie reporting me to the police.
Some people might think the 14-year-old faked being my girlfriend and wanted to bait me to do something illegal all along. That’s very likely not true. Because we had exchanged way more illegal nude pictures. I could have gotten over 100 counts and gotten a way longer sentence, but instead I ‘only’ got 17 counts. I think most likely what happened was we had a genuine relationship for 3 months, broke up. And maybe she still held resentment from how badly the relationship ended, some parents or friends found out and then pressured her, and so she eventually reported it to the police.
Both of us exchanging nude pictures and sexting was obviously consensual. Matter of fact the sexting might be the best part of our relationship, that both of us always enjoyed, and yet that was the act I got arrested for. I definitely was verbally abusive, unnecessarily insulting and a bad boyfriend. But does that deserve 5 years in prison? Of course not.
You know my opinions on pedophilia, any sexual act to someone underage that is consensual and harmless should not be illegal. Although I regretted many things I said to that 14-year-old, I never regretted having that relationship. And I obviously don’t think I should have been arrested. There are millions of adults in the world who have been arrested for having completely harmless, loving relationships with children.
And most of them unlike me, has a child who becomes devastated once their adult pedophile lover is arrested. That child will then go through years of therapy, and might even become suicidal. Not because any adult sexually abused them, but because their adult lover they care deeply about is suddenly imprisoned and taken away from them.
I hope my story, my arrest, and the years I spent in prison, brings light to that.
See my blog posts on Why Should We Defend Pedophiles?